I have the best idea for a television show, y’all. It’s a show full of drama and angst — you’ll feverishly await the next episode to see what happens next! It’d be a show set up like a soap opera, complete with cheesy music and awkward turns toward the camera . . . only with four-year-olds instead. A soap opera is exactly what it is like out there on that playground, at least to hear Lydia tell it.<\/p>\n
“How was your day,” I ask Lydia each afternoon when I pick her up. She gives me the rundown of the day, channeling my mother summing up the days’ Young and the Restless.<\/p>\n
“Abby didn’t want to be my friend,” she begins, “but Arya is my BEST friend. I had the small bike. And I didn’t throw sand.” This is completely different from the previous day, when she was whining that Arya wasn’t her friend but Abby was.<\/p>\n
I used to get a run-down of who got in trouble, but that has stopped now that the person getting in trouble is usually her<\/em>. “I was on ‘RED’ today, Mom. Do I get any M&Ms? Nevermind, I don’t want any M&Ms.” Ha, that’s a load of malarkey, I know she’s super peeved about the M&Ms.<\/p>\n Another time after the ‘how was your day’ question, Lydia looks straight at me and, without cracking a smile, says, “I got killed today.”<\/p>\n “Oh, did you?”<\/p>\n “Yeah. I was a princess.” <\/p>\n “How did you die?”<\/p>\n