Archive for January, 2009

conversation with Lydia while changing her diaper

Saturday, January 10th, 2009

Me: “Okay, time for some Butt Paste.” (grabs big ass jar of paste)

Lydia: (chews on distracting toy)

Me: “We sure do still have a lot of this stuff. I think it’ll last us throughout you and any future children there may be. You know, your Aunt Cathy has two of these things. That’s a lot of Butt Paste.”

Lydia: MMMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmAhhhhhhMMmm!

Me: “She better get with the babymaking if she wants to use up her paste. Later on people will ask her, ‘So why do you have five children?’ and she will say, ‘I HAD to — I had TWO jars of Butt Paste!’ “

peeve of the day

Friday, January 9th, 2009

I hate the constant misuse of the word ‘literally.’

The bill will not literally hit Capitol Hill unless it is dropped from an airplane and lands smack on the dome at terminal velocity. KABAM!