the devil’s spawn

Earlier I see the kids messing around with some water that has been sitting out on the back deck for a while. Afraid they’re thinking about drinking the water, I pop outside to see what they’re up to. “There’s little things swimming in the water!” Lydia exclaims. “We’re pretending they’re baby frogs, so we’re going […]

kitchen complaints, episode six

Sam: “I’m still hungry!” Pause for effect. Sam: “I’m still hungry!” He still gets no reaction. Sam: “I would like some more veggie sticks.” Me: “Please?” Sam: “I would like some more veggie sticks, please.” Me: “Okay, I’ll give you a few.” Lydia: “You mean several. You will give him several veggie sticks, because a […]

kitchen complaints, episode five

The kids are having lunch. Sam hollers from the kitchen, “Mommy, I need some more blood!” “I’m sorry, what?” Lydia pipes up. “We’re pretending we’re Godzillas and the milk is the blood. We would like some more blood.” “We would like some more blood, please,” I correct. “We would like some more blood, please!” the […]

sleep stories

Sam is beginning to realize he has dreams at night, so he’s usually looking forward to tell me about them in the morning. He hasn’t picked up on the word ‘dream,’ though; he calls them Sleep Stories. Man, he can be so damnably cute! A few mornings ago he walks into the kitchen after waking […]

words of comfort

Earlier this month my very old and trusty Panasonic pencil sharpener honed its last pencil. I had to order a new sharpener, which came in the other day. This Monday is the first day we’ve put it through its paces. Sadly, this sharpener isn’t up to snuff compared to my old Panasonic. “Man, this sharpener […]

i’m telling

Sam wondered into my room, looking concerned. “Mommy, Lydia play slide,” he tells me. “What do you mean by ‘play slide?’ ” I ask. “Like this,” he answers, and he makes a motion with his hands like its sliding. “I’ll go check.” “I came to tell you. I not doing it,” Sam clarifies as we […]

that’s questionable

I often find myself remarking on the amount of questions Lydia asks me during any given day. She questions everything. So this past Monday, I wrote down every question she asked throughout the day, minus all the weird little situations (mumbling, questions while driving in the car, etc.). Here’s what I came up with. ___________________________________________________________ […]