I don’t have cable. I used to about a year ago, but I decided that fifty bucks a month on top of my phone/DSL bill was a shitload of money, and something had to go. Naturally, internet was my top priority, then cable, then the landline phone. Unfortunately, the DSL needs a landline to work, so the cable got the boot. My BellSouth bill was still nuts (about one hundred smackers a month, and that’s without long distance), but I saw no other way around it; cable internet doesn’t come down this road.
Thankfully, I was only hooked on two shows: Six Feet Under and Friends. Ken usually gets me copies of SFU and my mom keeps me up to date with Friends, plus I’m able to catch reruns when I visit home. With the very last episode of Friends coming up this Thursday, my plan was to watch it over at my office; a practice usually reserved for Auburn away games during the fall. However, I got to thinking about cable again; after all, I’ve only got three more months of middle class poverty.
I humored my wild idea with some quick research, and lo and behold, cable internet is now offered in my area. “Hmmm,” I thought. Granted, DSL is probably faster and more reliable, but cable sure is cheaper! I do some quick calling and find that I can get digital basic cable plus cable internet for, get this, thirty bucks cheaper than my current phone/internet bill! Hell yes, sign me up!
It will all be installed tomorrow afternoon, just in time for the Friends finale. I had to call BellSouth to arrange to get my service cancelled. There was a lot of joy in that action, let me tell you.
Annoyingly happy customer service rep guy: “Hi, this is [annoyingly happy customer service rep guy], thank you for calling, how can I help make your BellSouth experience more incredibly stupendous today?” (I’m serious, he really said this).
Me: (stifling laughter) “Uhh, yeah, I’d like to cancel my services.”
Annoyingly happy customer service rep guy: “Awwww . . .”
I love how at the end of cancelling all of your services with BellSouth, they still say, “Thank you for using BellSouth.” It reminds me of a time when my dad was on the phone with those people trying to work out some nutty phone problem. By the end of the conversation, Dad was pretty annoyed, and when the rep said, “Thank you for using BellSouth!,” Dad shot back, “I have to use BellSouth!,” and hung up.
So, summing up, for those of you that really know me, you’ll only be able to reach me by my cell phone, which is all I’ve been using lately, anyway. I am free of the BellSouth Nazguls, or at least I will be come Tuesday.
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Heehee, I bet after this post, anyone that googles the word ‘BellSouth’ will get this blog at the very tip-top. BellSouth, BellSouth, BellSouth. There. And if you’re really easily amused, this is what my friends and I think of the mighty, mighty BellSouth.
