the tree, 2019

I came to a realization this year as I threaded the lights onto the tree. My method is like a sewing machine. I wind the string of lights around my leg, up my back, over my shoulder to my left hand, then to my right. This keeps the tension how I like it. I’m an overachieving Christmas light-sewing maniac.

This year . . . the amount of lights is nuts. This has gotta stop. I have got to find a way to do less. How do I do less?!

And so, I present to you The Tree, 2019:

I am moving slowly, so the kids’ trees aren’t yet set up.

Number of lights on the tree: 5,050.

(I wish I was kidding. I am not kidding.)

Times cat has eaten the tree and barfed: 0

Ornaments broken: 2

Trips taken to Lowe’s to buy more lights: 2

Amount of lights purchased: 800

Percentage of lights that still worked from last year: 100%!

Interventions threatened: 2